I loved this (yes I changed the word 'stuff' from an expletive)
Buddhism: If stuff happens, it's not really stuff.
Islam:If stuff happens, it's the will of Allah.
Hinduism: This stuff happened before.
Judaism: Why does this stuff always happen to us?
Catholicism: Stuff happens because you're bad.
T.V. Evangelism: Send more stuff.
Atheism: No stuff.
Jehovah's Witness: Knock knock, stuff happens.
Christian Science: Stuff happens in your mind.
Agnosticism: Maybe stuff happens, maybe it doesn't.
Existentialism: What is stuff anyway?